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Cherry Tart
#50/50
“Sweet on the outside, rotten on the
inside”
Favorite Books:
Unknown
Turn-ons: Unknown
Turn-offs: Unknown
Hobbies: Unknown
Weapon of Choice: Misdirection
Cherry Tart’s past is shrouded in a dark cloak
of mystery. Six months ago, smelling strongly of urine and
Bloody Marys, she wandered, dazed, into a local hospital.
Thrown in the psych ward, she was quickly diagnosed as being
in an extreme fugue state. She uttered neither sound nor
word for three months, seemingly content to sit and watch
Jerry Springer and Dr. Phil for as long as the
orderlies would allow. Cherry was finally shaken from her
catatonic state when a fellow patient attempted to steal her
beloved fruit and Jell-O. (While there is still much confusion
surrounding the event, one ex-employee, who asked to remain
anonymous, states that Cherry broke the patient’s wrist, poked
out an eye, and tore off an ear before shoving it into the
terrified woman’s mouth, shouting, “Here’s your dessert, bitch!”)
Shortly after being ejected from the hospital, Cherry was
discovered sleeping underneath a pile of newspapers outside
of Skateworld before a GCRG practice. The kindly roller girls
saw potential in the wild-eyed woman and took her gently under
their collective wings. While she started off rusty and weak,
they had faith that their Cherry Tart could one day be a fine
skater, and that faith has been rewarded.
While her origins remain unknown, some suspect,
based on her intimate knowledge of grammar, that “Professor”
Tart, as she is called at times, may have been an English
teacher who was driven mad by the excessive misuse of “there,”
“their,” and “they’re.” When her nurturing nature makes a
rare appearance, others posit that she was a kindly housewife
whose amnesia was induced by toxic fumes created by accidentally
mixing cleaning solutions which contained bleach and ammonia.
But for those who have caught a fleeting glimpse of the fury
that flashes briefly in her baby blues, they know the truth
is much darker and disturbing than they could ever imagine...
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